fridays finley fix...one day late!

just a post of cutie pics of our girl to get you through the next few days!

check our her outfit! STRIPES! all the way down to her toes! i think she was rather cute! and yes, daddy dressed her this day! and how cute is she it that first pic....standing there ON HER VERY TIPPY TIPPY TOES!

random shots of smiles! finley is, and always has been, such a happy girl! she never shys away from handing out smiles! she is such a joy.....OUR JOY!!!!

and then there is this face.....her "mad" face....that she does to make everyone smile and laugh!

gosh, i love this girl!

in other "news", we are officially done breastfeeding.

the last time we breastfed was a little over a week ago, feb 3. a friend of mine had watched finley for a few hours in the afternoon for us (matt had something to do, and i had worked the night before and was working again that night, so i had to sleep). i picked her up and brought her home for her afternoon nap and before i laid her down, i breastfed her.

it was nice, peaceful, sweet....i looked at her, touched her face, rubbed my hands through her hair, trying to take it all in (because i knew the end was near and i wanted to remember, i mean, REALLY remember the last time)...i had been doing this the past few weeks every time she ate, just in case that was the "last time"....anyway....i paid attention to all the little details....taking them all in and just being in the moment....15 minutes later, she was done, i kissed her, and laid her down for her nap, and i went back to sleep....

little did i know THAT was the last time we would breastfeed.

friday came, i was going to put her to bed that night...and went to try to breastfeed her (we were down to only breastfeeding once a day) and when i went to latch her on, she pushed me away. what?!?!!?

so i tried again, and she pushed me away with both her little hands, turned her head, and started crying...

OH MY GOSH

shes not going to do it? for the first time in over a year....shes never acted this way....i kept trying to latch her on for a few more minutes, then reality hit me...

this is ridiculous. i dont want our last time to be where i have to force her, she crying and its all just bad....so i stopped trying.

i cried, i knew the end was coming, but when it actually got here....i cried.

i gave her some milk...

kissed her and put her to bed.

and then shed a few more tears....

the next morning, i thought i would try one more time ( it was 2/5, her original due date when i was pregnant, and the date i had in my head of when i was going to stop breastfeeding her)...and she did the exact same thing....

pushed me away (with BOTH hands), turned her head, and cried.

so we were done.

she decided we were done that thursday afternoon. feb 3. the day that it all was so right. the day that i paid attention to every detail...and have it all etched in my head.

i am thankful our last time was great, peaceful, and so right!

thank you miss finley, for giving me that!

and we made it breastfeeding for over a year~!

never in a million years did i think i would do that! i was one of those moms that said "ill try it and see how it goes"....and it "went" for over a year!

breastfeeding is not easy.

it is a huge commitment!

i have fed her many places, and have pumped many more (at the dave matthews concert, at the black eyed peas concert, in the parking lot at the cardinal games, in the car while matt is driving down the road, at work, countless friends and familys houses just to name a few places)...but all that, i truly believe,

was

SO WORTH IT!